-- Last Updated: Nov-09-12 10:49 AM EST --
Yanoer would try to hustle us into finding & buying only canoes he wants to "test paddle" for a day or two.
He'd want you to transport it to his house; freshly cleaned & polished. You unload it, and put it up on a rack for him.
When he was finished with it; you'd have to go back to his place, take it off the rack, load it back on your vehicle, and take it back home. Yeah, it would be filthy from paddling in those corn field ditches & city sewer lagoons.
Unless, of course, he thought your canoe was the "cat's meow"; in which case he would offer you about 1/3 of what you paid for it. Ask if he could finance it for 72 months? Then ask for a new paddle as "boot"; with a money back return on the paddle if he finds it 1 ounce too heavy or too light, or 1/4 inch too long or too short, to suit his taste.
Dave's lives in a wet dream. In the dream he's a multimillionaire; owns every metal flaked, streamlined, candy coated, most lusted after solo canoes between 12 and 16 feets that were ever produced. He'd have a full time staff of on call/24 hour a day/ "gophers" to load, unload, and clean his boats. The gophers, "ex hooter girls", would also act as shuttle bunnies. He'd have a full time gear consultant/buyer, and a chef to pack his lunch. A master cabinet maker, on call to make any necessary 1/8 inch canoe seat, or thwart adjustments. A full time researcher to seek holy grails, and a full time custom made trailer truck w/crew to pick them up. He'd wear one off, custom tailored, test paddling outfits.
Boat & paddle designers would do some major "sucking up" & "kowtowing" whenever Dave appeared.
I don't care what everybody else says about
Dave behind his back. Dave's ok; he just lives in a wet dream.
P.S. Actually, having ex Hooter's girls as shuttle bunnies, might not be such bad an idea after all.
Might have to work harder on convincing my wife about that; she ain't bought into that yet!
Since Mitt bit the bullet; I guess the possibility of my wife & I getting a tall, nubile, 19 year old, blonde, as a "sister wife" is a mute point.
Never hurts to dream; just ask Dave!
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